Woman refuses her mom’s demands for comfort and a place to stay after her golden-child younger brother, Luke, finally moves out and ghosts their mother, forcing her to face her own favoritism: ‘she’s all alone now and suddenly wants to “reconnect”’

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  • AITA for refusing to help my mom after she prioritized my golden child brother for years?

    "I told her she made her choices| and now has to live with them"
  • So, I have a younger brother, Luke, and growing up, it was so obvious that he was the favorite. My mom practically bent over backwards for him while I was the
  • responsible one good grades, part time job, helped with chores. Meanwhile, Luke got away with everything. Failed a class? "He's just stressed." Crashed dad's car?
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  • "He's just a kid." I swear if I set the house on fire, I'd get disowned, but if Luke did it, she'd ask if he wanted marshmallows.
  • It hurt, but I learned to deal with it. I moved out as soon as I could and honestly, going low contact helped my mental health a lot. Fast forward to a few weeks ago:
  • my mom called me, crying. Luke had moved out and is now refusing to speak to her because she told him he needs to start
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  • "acting like an adult.” Apparently, he expected her to keep paying his rent and groceries, even though he has a full time job now.
  • Anyway, she's now all alone and suddenly wants to "reconnect" with me. Wants to come visit, wants to spend the holidays
  • together, even asked if she could stay with me for a while since she's "not in the best place emotionally."
  • And here's where I might be the j I told her no. Flat out. I told her she made her choices and now has to live with them. That
  • I'm not her emotional support daughter now that her precious son has bailed. She started sobbing and saying she "always
  • loved me equally" and that I'm being cruel. My aunt even texted me saying I'm being heartless and should be grateful I still have a mom.
  • Now I'm feeling kind of guilty. I'm not trying to punish her, but I honestly don't feel safe letting her back into my life like that.
  • platypusandpibble NTJ! Isn't it just amazing how they try to rope you in after you've escaped their toxicity? Stick to your guns you will only get hurt again if you let her back in.
  • helpmeimstuckinatree NTJ. My brother was the golden child too. I left at 17 when I finished high school. I see them maybe once or twice a year, and they see my kids the same; my brothers kids are more important.
  • They like to complain about never seeing them, but they don't make the effort. You're better off without the toxicity; if your brother comes back you'll be back on the curb.
  • SafeWord9999 If she always loved you equally ask her when you can expect the backdated reimbursement for rent and grocery money for the last ten years

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